Rough Cut Feedback

I had many diffent responses from class members, family and friends regarding my rough cut.
Below are some examples of their comments:

• It's great to have the breathing before the visuals
• Good film title
• You should mix the soundtrack with the video noises instead of cutting it out.
• You should bring back the breathing at the end.
• You have obviously used editing to help build the narrative.
• Good variety of camera angles.
• Nice effects with the camcorder.
• Your other titles need finishing.

Here is a video of some of the comments from different people regarding my rough edit:

I have considered all of the above comments and decided to keep the soundtrack running all the way through the sequence and also, I used the breathing recording at the end again to add to the narrative.

The Inspiration for my Thriller

Memento is the film that inspired me to create my thriller. The use of crime and the twist to create a psychological thriller really intrigued me. Although I made my film quite different, I used the sub genres used in this film and put my own ideas to it.

I was originally going to have the stalker taking photographs of the family which I got the idea from this trailer with the camera sounds however, I realised when editing that it would be more successful if I show the rewinding and fast forwarding which is more interesting to watch and represents the stalker watching the videos back. 'Memento' also uses a rewinding effect when the man is shot. Here is an example from both 'Leverage' and 'Memento' whereby there is a rewinding effect to go against generic conventions of going back in time. 

I chose to use the rewind effect during the drug deal to symbolise the stalker watching the video he has taken. I think this is effective because the constant change in time means that the chronology doesn't have to be in order like other thrillers. 



 In 'Memento' we can see the bullet is rewound into the gun after the shooting and the gun is rewound back into his hand. I thought this was effective because you get to see it happen again to show it's significance.

I was inspired to change the chronology of my thriller after seeing it being done in 'Memento' as Nolan has chosen to tell the story backwards. He starts at then end and finishes at the beginning. To reflect this in my own opening, I have started with heavy breathing on a black background to create tension and I have ended my opening with that same breathing with the visuals to show the audience why he was breathing like that. I like how this created suspense from the start and makes the audience want to know whats happening so it helps build the narrative and keep them engaged. It was not my original intention to adjust the chronology of my thriller when I first started editing however, I wanted to be more creative and intrigue my audience, therefore, I thought it would be good to make my thriller different to most.

I was also inspired by a thriller called 'The Call' which was released in 2013. The plot of the film focuses on the role of 911 operators in law enforcement. Specifically, it follows Jordan, an operator who is still suffering emotionally from a bad experience with a teenager who she couldn't help in time and therefore, died which she feels responsible for. This links to the backing story of my thriller where the dad had something to do with the stalkers daughters death and therefore, his revenge is kidnapping his son. The idea of a kidnapping was used from this film because I think it was filmed really well and I like the man playing the kidnapper which is also a convention I chose to use. This was the main inspiration of my narrative whereas 'Memento' inspired my edit.

'The Call' focuses on kidnappings and murders however I have only used the idea of a male antagonist being a kidnapper. I also chose to stick to the conventions of not revealing his face to keep a sense of hidden identity until the audience see the entire film.

My Treatment

MY TREATMENT

A CRIME THRILLER: 

My thriller is going to be based on a young man who gets in with the wrong people in order to support his family financially. The opening will be of the father and son sitting on the bed to show how close they are as he reads his son a story. He receives a text with details of a meeting, grabs hold of a package which is hidden under his bed and says goodbye to his girlfriend and son before leaving the house. As he walks out the front door, we see this man through someone else's perspective. This person is watching him and takes photographs. The man walks down the street and into the playground where he does a drug deal to a young teenager. This is also photographed. He then goes back home which is when we see a video of the son that the stalker has on his camera. 

If my thriller were to be continued, the storyline would be that the stalker is someone the man knows who is trying to get revenge because of something that happened years ago to his daughter which would be shown as a flashback. He would kidnap the son and try to kill the man. 

The themes of my thriller are revenge, escape and fear.

The narrative is structured in real time with no flash backs in the opening scene. There will be only one line of dialogue as he says goodbye. The real suspense is when we see the recording of the son as we realise he is now in danger. 

There will be diegetic sound of the dialogue and non - diegetic sound of the soundtrack to create suspense. 

The main character is male, tall, unconfident and quite a passive character who has been pushed into drug dealing so he can support his family. A they had a child very young, they are struggling to afford to live. His wife and son don't appear very often in the opening however, they support the dad and there is an opening scene where the dad is reading to his son and the boy looks up at him to show their close relationship. The other main character is the person watching him although we never actually see his face. Then lastly, there is the person buying drugs who is a young teenager, typical of a lower class council estate family. Similar to the family in 'Shameless' a TV Drama series. This type of character usually wears a tracksuit. 


It would be set in a house and in the street/park (playground).

They are very close to each other and this house is in a little crescent which will make it a lot easier to film. 

All of the characters will be in normal/casual everyday clothing of a t-shirt, jeans/chinos apart from the boy buying drugs who will be in a tracksuit. 

For the outside scenes I will film in the afternoon as it starts to get dark and then make it look darker in the editing. I will edit it as a combination of a continuous sequence to show continuity some use of cross-cutting in order to build tension. 

My target audience for my thriller is for ages between 15-40 as these are the people who will be able to relate the most to the storyline and would understand it better. I feel the younger generations would enjoy it the most. 

Generic Conventions

Generic Conventions

Generic Conventions AS task

The Bourne Identity: Man on the run Thriller

Narrative: Car chases, gadgets and weapons.

Iconography: We expect to see some violence, guns, explosions and chase.

Characters: The spy is usually the main character. Appears as quite a strong and confident character able to solve missions. Usually seen as having authority and power.

Camerawork: over the shoulder shots, long shots, mid shots, close-ups

Settings: Mostly set outside or in the car, the bank



Blade Runner: Dystopian Science Fiction Thriller

Narrative: Classic investigation, chase. Reinforces an alpha male character as the detective.

Iconography: Stated where it was set at the very start. Eyes are used as a motif. Flying cars, projection onto buildings.

Characters: Typical detective, supernatural, clear protagonist, create suspense by playing deceptive games with each other.

Camerawork: Close-ups, mid shots, back tracking. Special effects.

Settings: Often based around reality. Normal everyday life however, tricks the audience into thinking they are living in a game. b
Urban environment, rundown areas, bars, hotel rooms, dark buildings or roof tops.

Thriller sub-genres

Thriller sub-genres

Thriller Genre

Thriller Genre

"The concept of a protagonist who is not in control thus seems virtually universal to the [suspense thriller] genre." - Charles Derry

• The protagonist is usually the victim in typical thrillers.

Considering conventions:

• The narrative centres around a crime for example, a theft or a murder.
• The protagonist is fallible and has an 'Achilles heel' that is exploited by the antagonist. The title of the thriller may relate to this weakness eg. Vertigo and Insomnia. 
• The protagonist will be seen 'in peril' in one or more scenes before the resolution.
• The antagonist ensnares the protagonist in an increasingly complex web, until the protagonist feels isolated and helpless. 
• The narrative presents ordinary situations in which extraordinary things happen.
• Micro elements combine in a build up of suspense. 
• Themes of identity are common: Mistaken identity, doubling/doppelgangers, amnesia.
• Themes of seeing, reflection and mirroring. Manipulation of perspectives and optical illusions are common. 
• The audience of a thriller is placed in the ambiguous position of voyeur. 
• Voyeurism can also be a theme and the objectification of female characters is common especially in earlier thrillers.
• A series of or one important enigma(s) are set up in the opening sequence of the film. It is further complicated during the first part of the film and only resolved at the very end. 

Genre Theory:

A "regulated variety" (Neale, 1980)

Genre theory is to do with a circulation of expectations between industries, media texts and audiences. This leads to a "regulated variety".

Hartley, 1999:

"A contract between producer and audience which 'disciplines' choices and reduces desires."

Genre is ideological

"The genre films offers a lesson in how to act within society and how to deal with current problems and anxieties. But it does not offer neutral ways of dealing with social problems; instead, it prescribes a preferred set of values."

An example of preferred sets of values in todays films are those of capitalist ideology with its emphasis on the individual.

All theorists agree about the 'slippery' and 'fluid' nature of labelling texts in this way. But the exception to the rule is the pure genre text and of course the Auteur film.

Title Timeline

21 JUMP STREET

Title Timeline:

This shows the exact timings of when each title in the opening sequence would appear. This makes it easy to establish the order of the titles and for how long each one appears for. It also shows how many there are so it makes it easier when it comes to putting the titles into my own thriller opening. Although 21 Jump Street is not a thriller, most films use a similar structure for the title sequence.

Previous Thrillers Comments

Last Years Thrillers

This is an example of someones thriller from last year. Although I thought there were some really good close-ups that were significant to the genre of 'thriller', the shots that were used didn't give any indication as to what the story is about and it was slightly confusing. I did like the shot of her circling the picture of the man to symbolise him being a target but the rest of the shots were very random so I wasn't engaged from the start.





This is another example of someones thriller which is very different. I like the change in sound to create tension and a shot of both the watches to show the significance of time. The walking through the street towards each other also creates tension as the audience want to know what is going to happen. The title is also very clever as a word in Latin which means agent. This instantly tells us what the character is. The only thing I didn't think worked in this video was how set up it all seemed although the environment around them was casual. It looks as if everything has been set up and not just happened by chance.

A Level Student's Thriller - 59/60

This is a good thriller because there is an establishing shot to start with which automatically captures the audiences attention as it's a car park which is usually associated with a huge place where things can happen to someone. The costume of the two men in black suits shows their authority over a young teenage boy in a hoody on skates. Also, the titles being placed around on walls etc. as he skates away from them was very clever. The use of a lift creates tension because they usually take their time. The camera only focuses on the mens feet until the boy is right in front of them. This creates suspense by hiding their identity. They wear sunglasses to still remain undiscovered. There are many long shots used to capture the full image of the chase. Close-ups are used when they find each other to wait for a reaction shot before they start to chase after the boy. The last shot with the gun shows how serious it is and that there could be deaths in the film.

21 JUMP STREET

Title Timeline:

Thrillers I've seen

Thrillers I've seen recently:

This image symbolises a sense of being trapped without knowing it yet because of the prison like bars on the windows. This mid-shot shows the woman to be happy however something will happen to turn her life upside down.

This shot creates tension as it is giving a sense of suspense as a car pulls up outside their house. The fact it is being shown through the peep hole of the door. Also because it's dark, it tells us something bad is going to happen.

This mid-shot from the side symbolises the tense moment of having to make a decision. The fact he is leaning forward with his hands closer to the box shows that he is in control. She appears more wary of him and what is being said to her.

This long shot of the woman shows that she is being watched and is in danger. The high angle used here also conveys this due to the fact that someone is looking down on her especially in such a big open space yet he hasn't been shown on camera yet.

This close-up is used repeatedly throughout the trailer to show how significant it is as the more time they have on their arm, the longer they live. As soon as it reaches zero they die. It keeps the audience engaged in knowing how much time they have left.

This is a mid-shot which has a fence as a separation between the workers and the man in charge of payment. It symbolises a hierarchy which is their way of living in order to survive.

This is a long shot used to show the urgency of reaching each other in order to survive. The woman is about to die as her time has almost run out. This shots really captures the distance to make a more tense moment to show how much she wants more time to live.

 This is a long shot which is used to show the setting and create a sense of danger because something is about to happen. As we can see the lights of the vehicle we can guess there will be a car accident. Also, looking at the setting, it could be that they are about to drive the car off the cliff or hit something.

This close-up of the car is used to emphasise the sudden braking and swerve they have made in order to try and avoid hitting something in the road. The man poking his head through the roof shows that the whole situation is dangerous.

The close-up of this letter is extremely significant to the film because the letter states the title of the movie. It also shows that someone is after them and being a thriller, we know it's not a joke. The black writing also shows a sense of danger.

The low angle here shows that this is the man who is trying to kill them. The hook for a hand is most evident here to show he has control and he is on a mission to murder the people who ran over the man.